Self-Defense #MindBattle Day 16

20:00

Let's start off from where I stopped yesterday.
Little brother, if you like get annoyed that I am calling you little brother, shake your head, twist your face, yen yen yen, you're still my little brother. Brother, I am so proud of you and it's such a beautiful thing watching you grow. I'm emotional because it was only yesterday you started school and now you're in uni. I'm proud of you. I'm very proud of you. I love you. (you better tell me back).

Yesterday, we were talking about taking walks. I'm proud to say that the walks I took today were the walks to and from class. I am not even ashamed, especially since I was seriously considering not going to class. See eh, it be like that some days.
Tomorrow is the last day in Surgery cycle and God knows that I am looking forward to the end of it. I am tired. Today, my teacher was asking questions and the whole group was just looking at him like 😧😑. He said, 'you stopped reading too early'. Please dear, just leave me, brain dey pain person.

And just in case, my dad decides to stop by my blog today, daddy, all of this is a joke. I am actually studying really hard. Those things you read before, that's just how we students communicate these days about our profound love for education and educational institutions.

I did create something today. I am tempted to call it something small. I almost always want to minimize the things I do. I think that it is a form of self-defense. I am always nervous that people will not think that I am good enough or that my work is 'all that'. So, I feel like if I minimize myself enough, maybe they'll see good or maybe they'll see it as not so good. Whatever they see, maybe it wouldn't hurt as much.

Here's what I did...

Maybe there's no need to defend me. What's the worst that could happen? People won't appreciate what I make? That's okay! In all honesty, I don't even like everything that I come across and it's not because they are bad but sometimes they are not just for me.
Maybe I'm actually not 'all that' but hiding because I am afraid of what others will think about me will not make me better. The only way to get better is to actually do something and that is what I'll do, keep doing and keep getting better.


Whew! Progress!!
There's a battle in my mind. It is full of anxiety and untrue thoughts. This is a documentary on how I win.
See you tomorrow at 20:00 GMT +2

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