Hi there! Thank you for continuing with me on this story. If you haven't already, do check out the previous parts; PART 1, PART 2, PART 3, PART 4, PART 5


It was one of the happiest moments of my life. I couldn't stop looking at myself in the mirror. My mom stood behind me. She was wearing a lilac coloured dress. It had glitters splashed all over it. The smile on her face was one I hadn't seen in a long while. It extended from her cheek to her eyes and it reflected in her voice as she told me how happy she was for me and how she was proud of the lady I had grown into.

There I stood, fighting the battle with my lacrimal glands. Trying really hard to hold back the tears because, well, it had taken a while to get my make-up done perfectly. After what seemed like an eternity but was really less than 5 minutes, the dam broke down and the tears began to gush down my cheeks freely; more freely than I had ever seen.
In that moment, my mom hugged me, she squeezed me tight in her arms and she said, "I love you my daughter".
"I love you too mom", I almost replied but I was jolted back to reality by the screeching of tires and loud noises.

"Get down from the car!"

I was still trying to wake up and understand what exactly was going on when I received a very hot slap on my cheek. Tears streamed down my cheek, this time, they were real. I saw George lie on the roadside and I tried to find out from him what was going on but every sound I made attracted some sort of beating from these "good guys"

After a while, George couldn't take it anymore, he just couldn't lay there and watch them beat me up like a cow so he stood up and tried to defend me. I mean, I love him a lot  but I wouldn't say that his decision making ability was at it's maximum capacity at that moment.
As soon I saw him standing I screamed, "NO!!!
                                                                 GEORGE, 
                                                                 STAY STILL!!"

But my words arrived rather too late for the next thing I saw was his blood on the road. I loved making a mess while creating but I couldn't stand the sight of blood. So, as the blood trickled down his face, each drop seemed to sing to me a lullaby and soon after, I passed out.

REALITY?
I pretty much didn't know what was real and what wasn't for I kept discovering myself in different worlds and scenarios and it all didn't add up. Every attempt at trying to figure out and understand the events of this evening delivered to me on silver platters, constant rounds of headaches or should I rather refer to them as migraine? I don't know the difference between both but I do know that it felt like a war was being fought in cabinets of my head which sent off constant sparks and lightning, cutting off the energy supply from the rest of my body and magically disappearing the desire for food.

On that bright Tuesday morning, it felt like I had been visited by some angels and the fairy god mother had waved her wand over me giving me a new head because I honestly felt nothing like I felt two weeks ago. During the last two weeks, I had fallen in and out of consciousness but by today, it felt like I had fully recovered.
My arms were moving. "Yaaaaas!"
After having a mini-celebration in my head, I called out for George. He was doing a lot better than I was and it really surprised me. I could see the scar from the wound on his face. He was healing fast but I kinda liked how it made him look, weird huh.

"I'm really sorry"
"I should have listened to you"
"It's all my fault"
Those words slipped out my mouth with great ease.

"..shhh!" George spoke up.
"It's not anyone's fault, okay"
"I want you to focus on getting better"

Soon after, my doctor walked in. She looked like she had been working long hours but she managed to wear a smile when entered the room.
"Tired much", I said as I smiled at her.
"Yes but I love my job" she replied with a much more realistic smile on her face.
"You look a lot more better than you did when you came in here", she said.
Can I speak to you in private?
"You can say whatever in front of George," looking at him, with our eyes interlocking and a smile on my face, "he's family" I continued.
"Okay, we physically examined you when you were brought earlier and we discovered that you were raped.."

She did go on saying a lot of things about how she would recommend I see a therapist and blah blah but the happiness that I woke up with was gone in those minutes.
"So, in addition to head trauma I received from the battering, I was raped?"
"..we discovered that you were raped.." Her words played over and over in my head even after I had been discharged. I couldn't just deal with it.


Yesterday was one of those days where I tried to fit the pieces of my life together and make sense of how I got to this point. I had everything planned out, I was going at the right pace in the 'right direction but right now, my life didn't make any sense.
In the midst of my depressed confusion, I slit my wrists.



For sad and gloomy days exist,
Where pain and confusion may kiss.
But on those sad and gloomy days,
Remember love will find a way.


Always remember that '..today belongs to YOU!'
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Have an AMAZING weekend!
See you next week FRIDAY!